Hello there, my name is Son Dang, but you can either call me Son Dang or Son Dang, and it does matter which one you choose. I am currently 18 years old, and currently regretting my whole teenage era for not getting a teenager girl pregnant, and go on MTV to disgrace the whole Asian race (f*** you, William Hung). As you can expect where I’m from (since I’m Asian), I was born in the most exciting state of the USA, (dramatic pause)…. Kansas, yes, theres like, um… the joy of watching the frequent friendly tornado just casually flipping 18 wheeler semi trucks with the shrapnal coming over 9000mph towards your favorite fence that you peed on and um, watching inbred children take dumps on my mailbox, because you know, I just love waking up to the smell of missing chromosomes in my mailbox, EVERY MORNING.
From there, I grew up as a white supremist who finally realized that his member was significantly smaller(don’t worry, I’m longer than Yunho) than his white friends after taking ferociously a long shower hug with them, thus making him realize that he was a true Asian. I would personally consider myself as a hero since I punched the school bully in my balls when I was in 6th grade and then decided move out to Washington, since as being can far as even decided to do more like. As soon as I arrived in Washington, I began to formulate a plan to create. I am happy..ish.
Oh, right, this was 24-7KPOP, not match.com. Ok, well, here starts a timeline of my involvement with K-POP! So, when I was about 4 years old, my mom brought in VHS tapes for me to watch (I will not disclose the kpop artist), which, unknowingly, almost made me want to recircumsize myself and throw my foreskin at the girl I had a crush on (yes, I know, I’m such a romantist, and YES, kpop really sucked back then). Well then, about 2 years later, my cousin came to live with me and oh my based god, she was bootylicious (not really, shes asian, and had a flat trunk, but you don’t know what I mean), and also brought more VHS’s to watch. Dubious to the huge impact the VHS would make on my music preferences, I sat down and watched the VHS start, and BOOM! “g.o.d” came on, and WOW!
I have never seen such ugly kpop singers.
But, their music started to grow on me, allowing me to develop an actual taste for music, and which the song was called “Lies”, which turned out to be literally the most listened track of the first decade in Korea. I also became more interested in g.o.d after their Babysitting Diaries, which was also a spectacular success of launching them on the spotlight. Years passed, and I became tired of g.o.d and actually quit listening to music for a while.
One day, however, my crush, yes the same one from earlier, linked a video on her myspace, and it was TVXQ’s – Why did I fall in love with you?. Initially, the song didn’t get to me, but then, when I actually took the lyrics to my heart, those words hit me with such an impact that I was gonna go gay for TVXQ. Then I realized, K-pop should be given another chance, and I began to listen to kpop again and from there, I was fully in love with kpop, and nothing could ever break it away from me.
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